Anger As Medicine || why anger is healing || Irene Lyon

– Hey, you guys, Irene Lyon here. Welcome to this video today. This video’s gonna be sort of a Q&A to a recent article
that I just posted out called Anger as Medicine: How to Cure Self-Sabotaging Behaviors. Now, I wanna just address one thing, and I’m not going to
regurgitate that article. I will post it below this video, so you can go in and
read it at your leisure. But one of the questions I was getting, there were a few people
that were a little, not happy with my idea
of anger as medicine, and I’m not sure if
those folks had actually read the article, or if
they just saw the title and then instantly thought,
“Oh, this is crap!” I have no idea. But the one thing I really want to convey is that when I say anger is medicine, I don’t mean violence. I don’t mean crime. I don’t mean abuse. I don’t mean rage, even. I don’t mean aggression in
a sense that is damaging. I mean the emotion, anger, just like sadness, is
an emotion that we feel. Anger is a physical, internal, biological, sensory emotion that we must feel. And for many of us, and
I don’t know the stats, but I can tell you, it’s
probably very, very high. Most of us living in our
civilized Western world, ‘specially the first world, we have been taught that anger is bad, that we shouldn’t express it, and we get it confused with violence, and it’s not violence. Anger is an internal energy
that is our life force. It’s what allows us to set
up boundaries, and say, “No,” or to say, “I don’t like that,” or to protect something, when threat is imposed upon us, to us, whether it’s physical abuse, sexual abuse, verbal or emotional abuse. And when you read the article, I have a story of a
little girl that I saw, who was probably two, and she was being ignored by her dad, she was having what we consider, what we would consider a temper tantrum, and, just read the
article, so you get an idea of what I’m talking about, but I saw this and it sparked me to wanna write this article, because what occurs when a little person is having that kind of a temper tantrum, and they are being ignored, ’cause that’s what was
happening with the dad. He just literally was walking
away and leaving her there. And we were in a public
spot, this wasn’t like, in the bushes in the middle of nowhere. He was clearly nearby,
but he had left her sight, or her side, and she was in big distress. And when we have that kind
of thing happen to us, we shut down over time. That little girl is gonna learn that her internal sensations
and her discomforts and whatever it is, her frustrations that she’s feeling, that they are not OK, and because a little person has to survive and do what they have to do
to stay loved and cared for, over time, these sorts of
things make it such that a human being represses
and holds things in, and they don’t let out their true nature, their life force, their emotions, be it anger, sadness, joy, etc. So it comes down to the emotion of anger, not the actions that anger can produce if not integrated and processed properly. So there’s a big, big
distinction in there. In the article, I also quote
the work of Dr. Gabor Mate. He writes about anger
extensively in his book, “When the body Says No.” So check be sure to check
that out if you want a little bit of backup
around this information. But even he, in that book, speaks to the energetic component of anger, feeling the internal fire, that we feel when we’ve been wronged, and then knowing what to do with it, knowing how to engage with
the people in our lives in a way that isn’t volatile,
but is socially engaged, but also enables us to express
something that we don’t like. The trouble with this is that because we have suppressed
this so, so much, we just, we have no framework, we have no road map for how to do this. So, we’re at a really
interesting time right now, in the world, because
there’s so much violence, there’s so much crime, yes, there are lots of folks
that are shifting that, and people are being
loving and compassionate, and there’s a lot of good
humanitarian work happening, but by the by, there’s a
lot of bad stuff happening, and in order, I believe,
in order for that to shift, in order for that to change, we need to start recognizing our true biological, animalistic
selves, ’cause we are, we are mammals, and we have emotions just like the tiger, just
like the starling dog, just like those gorillas,
that have huge life energy. And when we squash that life energy, not only do we keep ourselves small, but we end up getting sick. There’s a connection
between the suppression of life force energy and chronic
conditions later in life, whether physical or mental. Depression is a big one. When we squash our anger
and our life force energy and we don’t allow it to
flow, we get depressed, because we can’t, we
can’t function continually in this sort of suppression state. So in other words, what happens is we don’t even realize
that we’re suppressing it, ’cause it’s happened
from such a young age, and maybe that’s what we
saw when we were growing up. Or the flip side, we
saw too much violence, too much aggression in the household that was volatile, and not contained, and so the last thing we wanna
do when we become adults, is show that energy. So, I wanted to just say that. Really, it’s just a
sidebar to this article, so definitely check that article out, read it in its entirety,
it is a little long, but there’s a lot of
good information in there to sort of just let you
know, like, this is normal, and it’s also something we’re not used to, therefore it’s going to seem a little odd to think of this idea
of anger as medicine, but trust me when I say 99.999% of the clients I work with, who have various chronic
problems in their health, mental health, immune system health, anger is something that they have real difficulty expressing. There’s often a lot of
shame attributed to it, and we wanna get that healthy stuff out in a way that is contained, safe and gives us good, good
energy and resiliency. That’s it for today. Take very good care, and
we will see you next time. Hey guys, it’s Irene Lyon here and thank you so much
for watching this video. And if you would like more of these videos and more information
on your nervous system, how to heal it, how to keep it healthy, right below you can click onto my website and sign up for my email updates. Have a great day, and hopefully
we’ll see you over there.


  1. This is such a good video, thank you for that. Giving anger the space it needs, it is so crucial. So important. My dad totally suffocated my anger, I was not allowed to get angry, unlike him who got angry so often. I had to work through a lot of shame to be okay with letting anger come out properly, being okay by acknowledging it.

  2. Thank you so much. This speaks volumes when it comes to loving yourself, and allowing yourself to speak up; in a healthy way, about things that really piss you off! What is the "healthy way"? How do you not feel guilty about expressing your anger, in a society that shuns going against the "status quo" ? At 47 years old, I'm finally letting go of trying to be like everyone else, by pretending that I'm not pissed off! Later for that! If I truly love someone….. I'm going to tell you when you hurt me or piss me off! Period! I love this…..and thanks again 💞

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