Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) & Mindfulness – Mental Heath Videos with Kati Morton

hey everyone thanks for checking back. now this weeks video is something that you have asked for alot and it has to do with my borderline personality disorder video the BPD video that I put up so if you havent watched that, check that out. but this is kind of diving deeper into DBT therapy Dialectical and Behavioural therapy. now DBT therapy is a type of therapy that is used alot for Borderline Personality Disorder patients and theres a woman Martia Lineham and I never know if i say her last name right. Martia wrote a lot of books about it and created DBT therapy and one of the main components of DBT therapy is mindfulnes. ok so what is mindfulness? im being mindful right now, that word is used a lot but in DBT therapy its very specific and its very detailed. like, way too detailed but, today im going to talk to you about kind of the’what’ skills of mindfulness and mindfulness is broken down into about 6 different skill sets and today im just going to talk about 3. so you can see why DBT is a practice. its something that you, as a clinician, study, eat, breathe, sleep if thats all you do 9 til 5 or 9 til 6.30 or whatever your work day is, every day, all day. so mindfulness is a way we can help regulate our emotions and to that i mean if we’re feeling, honestly if we have borderline personality disorder we’re like i dont know how I feel, i just feel overwhelmed, thats how I feel but, if we’re feeling a lot of emotions and theyre just building up and waah we feel overwhelmed, mindfulness will help bring us back down. and the first thing we want to do is observe. and i know that seems really bizarre, but what i mean is, if you start feeling anxious, but you dont quite know what it is yet. you just have that sense tat somethings building, right. we start to notice. hey my palms are getting sweaty, my heart is racing, im breathing faster and my thoughts are going a million miles a minute and all this stuff is happening. we need to notice that right. we dont need to control it. we dont need to control whats happening. we can control our focus of it but we dont have to control the actual emotion does that make sense, we’re just watching and we’re noticing. and i read a couple of articles and people describe it as having almost like a teflon mind. teflon being those frying pans that nothing sticks to cos we’re not letting anything take hold of us, we’re not ruminating about being angry, sad,mad happy,elated, whatever we feel we’re not sticking on it we’re just noticing. ok? and that even in itself with my clients, thats months of work. right, just to observe, but thats something we can do slowly but surely. we just take note observe whats happening, when we have those kind of breakdowns where you feel like your heads going to explode, notice what that was like, how did it build up. what happened today and yesterday and you kind of go back and observe. then, and i made notes because sometimes this gets a little tricky so after we’ve observed then we need to describe the experience. so like i was saying after we’ve looked inside ourselves and noticed our palms were sweaty this is happening, then try to put words to it. we dont have to know the emotion yet because a lot of times, and for many of you, i know Jess, we’ve talked a lot and you’re like, i dont know how im feeling and we have those happy and sad pictures you put up. this is the time when you have to put words to it. those words being my heart was racing, i felt this, i felt this. it doesnt have to be an emmotional description, how was our body responding? ok so try to put words to your experience. now that takes some time aswell, but you can ] see how they kind of go hand in hand, how the observe goes hand in hand with the describing and putting words to it. so the last portion that im going to talk about today is participate, and im reading my notes cos like i said there are 6 parts of just this portion. so this is kind of letting yourself act intuitively and participate in life so FEEl angry, FEEL sad, FEEL elated, FEEL in love, feel whatever, right whatever youre feeling, feel it. come from your wise mind, and we’ll talk about that in another video stay tuned for wise mind. but come from a place of the observe and the putting words to the experience, but still have the experience, you dont need to hold back and not allow yourself it and be so controlled we’re not controlling our emotions, we’re controlling how long we allow ourselves to deal with it and ruminate on it. does that make sense? the difference between participating and responding to it? thats almost like i guess if i was going to give youa good analogy. i get a ticket on my car come out and the parking metre is up and i got a ticket and im like son of a hfkshfgashfbakh right, i respond immediately. and lets say i see the metre maid and im like, you son of a bitch sfkjanfjn and i just lose it, that would be responding. but if im going to participate i would say to myself, that really sucks! I dont have 65 bucks thats so frustrating i should have planned better and i just allow myself to feel upset, but im not ruminating im not responding im not reacting i guess is the best word, im just participating ok? so this is gonna be a very long period of time we’re going to do many videos on this topic because its very haard to comprehend and it takes time and practise. but this week we’re going to practice mindfulness. so i want you this week to observe. lets just do number 1 i know we had 3 things we had observe, then we would describe it and put words to it. then we would participate, but this week we’re just going to observe. so notice how youre feeling in your body and whats going on, before you reach that overwhelmed stage. and leave comments below if any of you have done DBT therapy i know many of you have and youve had great results. leave your tips and tricks and things that have helped and how helpful DBT therapy was and if it wasnt let me know. like hey i like THIS kind of therapy better and we can do videos on that too cos thats what we do i listen to you you speak to me and i do the videos that people want most, and if you like this video give it a thumbs up and let me know, and dont forget to check out my borderline video that i talked about earlier and dont forget to subscribe to my channel because like i said i’ll be putting out many videos on this topic so you want to make sure to stay tuned and catch it, and keep working with me towards a healthy mind and a healthy body Subtitles by the Amara.org community

100 comments

  1. This is great – a great summary of the WHAT skills…do you have a video on the next step…the HOW skills? I would also like some exercises to use!

  2. I'm very into mindfulness. I learned a different method, and I learned it very easily. It's actually a very easy technique (though still hard to master of course). Definitely not something advanced, if you are new to therapy and this sounds interesting you can jump right in.

    First week, sit comfortably, and observe your breathing. Don't try to change your natural breathing, just watch it. Whenever you notice your mind wander and you think about something else, just refocus your attention on your breath. Do this for at least 1 minute every day for a week (it's more important to do it every day than do spend several minutes on it).

    Second week, sit comfortably, and begin observing your breathing again. Continue to not change it. This time, when your mind wanders, notice where your mind is going. Don't try to change your mind, don't try to judge your thoughts, just continue paying attention without judgment to your breathing and whatever other thoughts or feeling happen. Do this exercise every day for a week.

    Third week start doing the exercise as your are doing daily activities, especially ones without a major emotional/physical response. Do this as often as you can, all day, every day. This will build up your ability to focus on the present moment even when under stress.

    By the fourth week, I was able to easily pay mindful attention to my inner storms, which allowed me to simultaneously feel them while keeping my mind clear and able to navigate the emotions and thoughts, so I could start to unwind them.

    I see that I have a lot more to learn, but the effects are obtainable within days of starting. The number one thing a person can do to speed up the learning process is practice every single day, even for a short amount of time. Repetition will allow your mind to naturally go into an attentive state instead of having to actively focus like the first week or two.

    The key of this exercise is to not judge your thoughts, feelings, or impulses, and to not try to change them before taking the time to actively sit in them and experience them (unless it is dangerous or harmful to yourself; always ask your therapist if you aren't sure). It's a method of directly confronting your problems, which can be hard but is always the best way to overcome them.

    Thanks for the videos, Kati Morton.

  3. DBT is really helpful in many ways like DEARMAN for assertiveness..there are many other acronyms PLEASE MASTER,ACCEPT etc…The key is to identify the Discrepancy Monitor which is the culprit for the Ruminating Mind..There two modes of our Mind Being and Doing…Mindfullness is more about living in the Being Mode…take a step back from the Doing Mode…It helps in controlling the Discrepancy Monitor…There is a nice book Full Catastrophe Living written by Jon Kabat-Zinn…its a Good Read on Mindfullness Based Stress Reduction Techniques…The mind also Ruminates due to Cognitive Distortions/Negative Emotions..Remember You and Your Mind are two different things..Mind Loves distractions and colors the reality in a distorded manner..Katie please could you do a video on Cognitive Distortions?

  4. I would be interested in the special offer at the end… you know, the one about working towards healthy mind and healthy body.I love the ad lib.

  5. I'm struggling with this because my therapist wants to do DBT therapy but I do not feel comfortable with the Buddhist background being a Christian so my question is, if i start doing this, will I be made to do Buddhist things without my knowledge?

  6. Question… How would someone utilizing CBT for BPD differentiate between having a "Teflon" mindset with their emotions and actually disassociating?

  7. I am very interested in obtaining training in DBT. I am EMDR trained but feel certain clients are not quite able to be present therefore a lot of work in mindfulness is helpful but DBT may help a few of my clients hoping to do EMDR with me as a goal. Thoughts on useful efficient trainings or tips for getting started with these clients? Glad to subscribe!

  8. love your videos. of note:- free online mindfulness course at futurelearn.com. They run a whole load of free courses run by universities world wide. the courses are 2 to 5 weeks. I am no related to futurelearn and don't represent them. I have bpd and social anxiety and part of my recovery is developing hobbies, interests and education.

  9. one of my favourite mindfulness techniques is noticing. I sit still and become aware of my body, thoughts, feelings and sensations. then when something arises "I'm noticing that I'm thinking that people will call me names" or "I'm noticing that I'm feeling abandoned" or "I'm noticing warmth in my back" then I refocus on my breathing. this makes it easier for me to have these experiences without creating an attachment or obsession to them and depersonalises them.

  10. vERY very helpful video <3 I don't have a therapist right now but imma try to use these things while I'm looking for a therapist just to see if I can 💗 ty Kati!!!

  11. reacting is a way better word. i didnt understand ur analogy until u switched to reacting. and ur brain on what u appear to think is a bad day, is still waaay better than most oeople on their best days 🙂

  12. I can see how DBT will work no doubt BUT the NATURAL state of mind can never be changed. So if you ever stop practicing even for a little while BOOM the BPD will ruin you. It suks. It cant be beaten 100% and it will always ruin relationships, make a fool out of me, I can never be someone. Always be too up too down and never have identity.
    On the plus side theres worse things in the world and good friends forgive – just have fun and forgive yourself .

  13. i have the first book from Marsha Linehan. and I'm investing in other DBT books. I have invested enough in my coloring hobby. lol
    I love your video's

  14. I don't know if it's more healthy or "better" to either follow a thought down the rabbit hole (meaning try to figure out why I'm thinking xyz and where it originated from etc) or to distract myself and do something else. I can't tell if distracting myself is merely avoiding the painful situation or if I'm being a masochist by trying to figure out these thoughts. Help please.

  15. I understand that you care for your patience but at the same time, coming from someone with BPD you are talking like you are talking to a child. I think that's more of NPD that you're addressing. They don't self recognize, BPD usually does.

  16. I have BPD and I can relate to what your saying. You are so right when you said "there are no breaks" in BPD. I need to watch this video another time or two. Thank you so much for this valuable video. 💖💖💖

  17. I hav bpd and I HATE therapy. I feel like it's the biggest waste of time (no offense lol) I listened to this w the best intentions but it literally makes pretty much no sense to me. How can anyone control what they think or how they feel? And if they cud, why wud they need therapy in the first place?

  18. Hi im psicology i have a border line patient and i just have 3 more session so i fell im going crazy because i think she cant focus in her problem ,and she is paranoic too help!!

  19. How do you make staying with an emotion replace responding? And why is it better? Freud basically said what's not expressed is repressed. I agree.

  20. Currently, I don't do DBT therapy, but from my last encounter at the supermarket where I busted out to the register woman, I made a seen. I am always embarrassed of my self and others are of me sometimes. I feel I am right to act that way, but I am not. I get it. I feel that it's okay to get emotional sometimes, but it comes at the wrong times and appear what I am not. When anger hits and exhaustion and something happens against what I want it to, I cannot control. Mindfulness and Dearman may be good technoques but I wish I can think of that when my emotions elavate and I just want to react. I really hope you make more DBT techniques videos so every day I have something new to practice.I am looking for a DBT group in my area, but I want to start right now. I can't wait for apptmnts and intakes and I have switched therapist so far and still looking for the right one. I am thankful that you can focus on people who struggle with BPD without the interpersonal communication. I find it challanging because I become either attached or just don't take the therapist seriously. What can I do of my efforts? I can't mstop making things so person all the time.

  21. I realize this video is 4 years old but I just found it and I want to sincerely thank you From the bottom of my heart for publishing these because I am in a place where I need therapy But I cannot afford it so I am using your videos to help myself in the meantime

  22. Hi Kati, Do you know of some good DBT audio mindfulness tracks? esp observing your thoughts, sounds, the breath? I'm having trouble finding some and really need them.

  23. Took dbt group. Too much vocabulary too remember. Makes me even more angry. Can’t stand listening to other people wine.

  24. i like this info but im sitting here in a tierded hase thinking i dont have the energy to stop myself from reacting…it all feels overwhelming and mentaly exausting.i need help but i dont want to feel like im back in school doing a tough assinment.

  25. Very helpful and educational videos. This whole mindfullness thing reminds me of Ekhart Tolle's The Power of Now book.

  26. Katie I love your videos!! I really want to work on DBT as I have Bipolar 1, PTSD, ADHD, and BPD. I believe it would really help me!

  27. I'm a new therapist (also MFT) and a lot of times there's so many different forms of therapy sometimes it's overwhelming to try and master them all. Your videos are so helpful and I can see myself using these to help explain certain concepts to my own clients. Thank You.

  28. I'm trying to write my dialectics (two opposing and true thoughts) in wise mind (balanced; not black and white) by using "and" to tie the two opposing thoughts together. Then I number them and when I journal I write on the number instead of feeling I need to redescribe things to myself. My goal with that is to be able to have a mental map of all my dialectics, the emotion that comes with each, the things that trigger them, and what helps regulate my emotions and brings me to wise mind. It's going to be a while before I get there, but I think it's going to be helpful based on the skills I've learned so far. Maybe that idea could be helpful to someone else as well.

  29. I'm still waiting to see if i get accepted to my local personality disorder clinic for BPD but it's looking unlikely that i will because my consultant feels i manage things fairly well on my own, in so much as i'm mostly on top of self harming, suicidal thoughts and attempts, risky behaviours like binge drinking, drugs, dangerous sexual interactions. The one thing i really, really, do struggle with is regulating my emotions, the emptiness, not knowing who i am, the neediness, dissociating. My psychiatric nurse keeps telling me mindfulness would be great for all those things, and i have been trying to get to get to grips with it, but all i get told is "it's just living in the now" and that doesn't help at all. These videos, on the other hand, do help because it's broken down into smaller portions that aren't as overwhelming and make more sense. They really do help and i definitely feel like mindfulness will do more than just help with my mental health, i feel like it will make me a better person.

  30. Thank you for these videos, I'm hoping to feel content…in all situations. I use meditation, breathing techniques, some stretching and yoga. My problems build up until I explode, everyone has given up on me; with the exception of my husband.

  31. I was sexually abused as a kid and physically and I am in chronic pain. I feel guilty for hurting for not being enough. and it compounds itself. It's like the abuse never ends and I don't want to be here. The pain is too much. anymore.

  32. I work as a DBT therapist, and after years of practice when I came across this method it fit me like a glove. One thing I have found is that the Books and materials from Marsha Linehan are great, but there's a TON of material to try to take it. I have begun to get in the practice of taking the ideas and materials and just thinning them down to make it more digestible.
    These videos help a great deal with breaking the ideas down to make it clearer. Thank you Kati, I'd love to see more DBT related videos !!!

  33. Im avoidant and when i oractice mindfullness tecniques i feel like many represed feelings come to light and many of them are so hard to support that i have to stop and don't want to practice mindfullness again becouse im scare of the hurt feelings

  34. Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) has been the hardest struggle of my life. I have dealt with alcohol and smoking cigarettes but BPD has been the one thing that I have to say has been the hardest
    Thank you for sharing all these videos and allowing us to not feel like we are crazy and untouchable.

  35. I love your videos I suffer with borderline personality disorder but I also have some cool mental health disorders along with it which is bipolar to PTSD and generalized anxiety disorder I am hoping that my therapist will be getting me started on dialectic behavioral therapy very soon because I’m only just finding out my primary mental health diagnosis which is the very first one I mentioned here I will be watching more of years and I understand this one is four years old and I have been watching as many of your videos as I can come a crossed thank you for putting them out for everyone to learn from

  36. Oh cool! This is exactly how i deal with… everything, with life i guess 🙂 this is very Vipassana! It’s all about observing and allowing your thoughts and feelings to come up without reacting to them. Amazing strategy. It completely changed my life. Thank you for sharing Katie, you’re awesome!

  37. Dear Katti, could you make a step plan to work on "DBT Skills training handouts and worksheets" bei Marsha M. Linehan, or do you know some website/app/video, where they can explain how to use this manual…I leave in Germany and its tremendously dificult to find therapy specially in my language…so I want to start on DBT by my self in the meantime…Thank you Kattie you are great!!! i wish you where my therapist!

  38. I'm just getting into DBT. I have BPD traits, but I'm not all the way BPD. It's hard because I'm doing DBT on my own because I'm focusing on other things in therapy. This video is so helpful because it's hard to just read and do a workbook!

  39. Dbt works amazing for anxiety and depression as well. My therapist doesn’t even use cbt because she believes it makes the ruminating and anxious thoughts worse. She teaches it to all her clients and has found more success than cbt.

  40. Thank you thank you thank you so much for these BPD and DBT videos! ❤️🙏🏻 The way you break everything down helps so much!

  41. Thanks for your videos. You are really helpful.
    Is DPB therapy only made for bordelines? If someone has some "bordeline traits", is this useful?
    Thank you

  42. This is just a Eastern version of Vispassana I guess! I did it and my BPD symptoms reduced so much so that now I don't have enough to be diagnosed as one. Just vague personality disorder is left

  43. tryinb to get back into my dbt skills because I've been off track for while and your videos help thank you

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