Heart-to-Heart: Post-Grad Depression, Anxiety & Staying Positive



everyone this is Silvia from beauty geeks and today we can do something a little bit different from what I usually do we're gonna sit down and have a chit chat together and let's let's talk about our lives a little bit so today I want to talk about something that I went through personally and I find that a lot of people go through as well and have a difficult time with it is post-grad depression or crisis there isn't a technical name for it but it's basically a clubbing feeling that you feel after you graduate from university or college and you kind of don't really know to do with your life after that so I'm not a specialist or therapist or anything like that and I'm not be able to necessarily diagnose what the problem is and be able to fix it but I do want to talk about my experience with it um to hopefully have you guys realized that you know you're not the only one out there dealing with it no worries and maybe share some advice that would help you guys get through it so I'm gonna start off by telling you what I went through so I graduated last April and I found that during my last semester of the year I was freaking out feeling very anxious um and my body just was not I guess taking it in I was stressing out a lot and not feeling very well um I had a lot of anxiety I went through a lot of anxiety a lot of anxiety and panic attacks um I've actually dealt with anxiety ever since high school but I had like mild cases where yes I would feel these symptoms that you get when you get anxious but it would be bearable but during my last half of the semester as well as after I graduated my anxiety was really bad I got Leni anxiety tacs probably like once every month I got an anxiety attack and I want how to go to the hospital for it because it was just a really bad experience and I don't think people really understand what it's like to go through an anxiety talk until they do go through it you literally feel like you're going to die I really don't know how else to explain it then you feel like you are going to die you must only don't know that I went through all this anxiety when you're watching my videos from the past year and being like Sylvia you look totally fine go totally normal well obviously you only see a tiny time Horsham I feel like 2% on my life and I worked really hard to keep my anxiety a secret I didn't want to tell anyone about it because again I didn't want to feel like I was the weirdo like I didn't want to be like the only one going through something and people not understanding my fear is that when I open up someone they're not going to understand and just look at me like I'm crazy so I don't want to talk about online that e1l like that's just a totally different story I don't really feel like talking about it to be honest but basically I was in pretty bad condition when it came to around that time I was graduating I was really scared because you go through your life like doing the same thing for basically 22 20 whatever years you're in school all your life and that's all you know you wake up you go to school you come home you have really not many that responsibilities and life is predictable it was easy but once you finish school it's like a totally new world out there and you don't know what you're getting yourself into school is something you've known for 20-something years your life and to be taken out of the element it's like basically being from cold water to hot water it's such a shock and your mind is just like what the hell is going on I'm the type of person where I'm very driven and I would say I'm kind of a control freak I control every aspect that goes on in my life and I plan everything out meticulously um I have a five-year plan in my head all the time and I have control of everything and that's what gives me comfort when I don't have control things is when my anxiety really kicks in so that's why I felt out of control when it came to the last part of graduating because I did not know what I was doing in my life and it just kind of came as a shock to me because it's like everything that I have planned up until that point has worked out perfectly everything has gone according to plan but when you come out of that situation there are so many things that you cannot control it's impossible to hold on and plan all these things because you cannot control all these outside factors so in my mind the plan was to graduate get a job in Toronto and just these live in the life downtown that's not how things actually worked out I move back into my parents home because I didn't know what I wanted to do and I did not have a job lined up so I can't be moving downtown with no source of steady income because it cost a lot to be living here so I went back home to my hometown for these summer and I kind of try to figure my life out but I was also going through a pretty bad breakup the time as well which might have added to everything else um but I just felt like everything in my life was not going the way I planned and I felt very I'm motivated to do anything it's a yes I could have gone and like apply to a million different jobs but I just felt like that's not what I wanted to do I was not ready for a nine-to-five kind of life and committing myself throwing myself into work that's not what I wanted I knew that was not going to make me happy I even considered moving all the way to LA because I kind of just wanted to start fresh and start over like that's what I tend to do when I'm scared of things that aren't happening I just want to like start fresh all over again but you know that's not necessarily the case you can't always run away from things that time so what I ended up doing was going back to school for another degree part time I figured that this way I could school part-time and work part-time and kind of ease myself into the work field and the feel of a career kind of life and I do think that was a kind of good decision like I'm pretty happy with what's going on right now it's been a year later since I graduated and I'm still trying to figure out my life I think that the years after you graduate are just so stressful because so much changes are going on and it's not things that you're used to and fear is what obviously hinders a person the most so to get open these things you really just have to not be scared and I know it's a very very difficult task to do like it's difficult to tell your self hey don't be scared of this it's crazy but sometimes you just have to throw yourself into situations that you don't feel comfortable in and you know what sometimes things just fall into place properly um when I was gonna move back to Toronto I didn't have the money to do it but then I got a job offer like out of nowhere literally a month before I was going to move back and it provided me that with the income that was sufficient enough for me to move downtown again um so I kind of just fell into place for me like there was no way that I could have made that come any faster it just fell into place and then as soon as I kind of got myself busy with school and work everything kind of just fell into place a lot better I started getting tons and tons of job offers and bigger stresses then oh my god which job offer should I take that is also a very stressful situation because taking on a career like job is much different than taking on a part-time job where you just go to work every day with no like real goals and projects to work you just do your mundane and work and then you come home and do whatever whereas career based jobs are like you go to work and you work on this project so you can't just like quit whenever you want you have to commit to this project and it is a very scary feeling but I recently took on a more career like job as well so I'm starting that soon and it was a very scary process for me to accept that but and you know what I'm slowly easing myself into it and I feel a lot better about it than just kind of jumping on it right away because I felt like I probably would have freaked out a lot more I am a firm believer of positive energy brings positive things so that's why I always keep myself as most as positive as I can be because I feel like as soon as you're really positive about things things just kind of fall into place and you see everything in a better light if you're dwelling on things that your mind is constantly seeing the negative and seeing the bad of everything so what you have to do is change your mindset and see the positive of things so that more positive things can come to you because you see these positive lights and this is what your mind is subconsciously looking for if you're feeling that post-grad slum my advice to you is to not be scared try to tell yourself to not be scared of things and you have to try new things and you have to put yourself out there and you have to get your motivation back so as much as you feel not motivated slumming and scared of things you are the only person that can take yourself out of that situation try a new project try a new job apply to a bunch of places just don't give up and see everything in a more positive light once you see a more positive light of things and start bringing in more positive energy and you will find that things are trying to fall in place more and yes you'll still goes through some struggles but the other day things will work out I just want to let you know that I am here with you I'm still going through a lot of these changes that it's making my life crazy but you aren't the only one and if you need someone to talk to that I'm be here to comment below and I'll try to help you with best I can and we can help each other so I know this video was kind of all over the place but hopefully some of you guys are able to relate and we can help each other out a little bit anyways I will toss you guys good soon thank you for watching and I'll see you later

22 comments

  1. Hi Sylvia, many thanks for the video. I finished University end of May 2018 and graduated in November 2018. It is now end of December 2018 So have been unemployed for 7 months. Iv been applying for jobs every day for over a year and have not got anywhere. I graduated with a Masters in Mechanical Engineering. I cant even get a part time job. I know people are in the same boat as me and I hope we can share the journey. Things will change, I'm sure, its just when isnt it. Any tips for feeling down all the time? All my friends have gone separate ways after uni so I dont really keep in contact with them, I just feel so down every single day and dont really enjoy myself if you see what I mean. Graduate unemployment is so high here in the UK, I thinking about going abroad but thats not easy with money etc. Many thanks

  2. I graduated in May and going through a breakup. I also feel unmotivated, scared and not passionate about anything… plus depressed.

  3. I'll tell you why you can't get the job you wanted and its because capitalism isn't about helping each other out, its about screwing people over for money and deceiving them. All these poor graduates with depression need to realise its not their fault and don't let the system destroy you. They've managed to get away with it by using psychiatry which is a form of social control to uphold and justify the unequal capitalist mode of production.
    Did you know psychiatrists use to label black slaves with "drapetomania" because they wanted to flee captivity in the 19th century. Today if you can't handle the stress of working for the minimum wage, not finding a job, being in debt or any kind of social problem you get labeled with a mental illness and drugged to the eyeballs to keep you quiet while the other slaves work for nothing, or immigrants do the job. Please look up anti psychiatry on YouTube and wake up people!

  4. I moved out for university and worked for 4 months after that. Because I missed my family too much, I moved to my hometown again and Im really comfortable but not satisfy with it. I applied to a new job and its my dream job, but Im so anxious to start over again, even though I know its a great chance for me. Thank you for this video needed this.

  5. I just finished uni 3 weeks ago and I dumped my cheating boyfriend of 2 years just a few days before my last exam. I feel like absolute shit!

  6. Graduated last December 2016.
    Despite its been only 4 months, I'm already feeling lost, lonely and leftout from my usual group of friends.

  7. I'm really glad I found this video. my anxiety has been surprisingly low but there still is an anxiety that i wish i couldtalk with my family about it more but cant… the video doesn't solve anything but it's comforting to hear

  8. Thank you so much for this video! No one every shares the experience of post grad depression, it's nice to know I'm not the only one. Happy for all the good that has come to your life!

  9. Thank you so much for your advice! I graduated in May 2015 and have been suffering very bad depression and a lack of motivation. It's a constant battle, some days I'm fine and some I'd be depressed for a week. I'm still struggling through it but I think it's gotten better. Like you said, I've started applying to various places and that started to get me motivated to get the job. I think your advice about being part time student and working part time is great, especially for those who are having a really hard time. Anyways, thank you for your advice and I wish you the best in your future. 🙂

  10. Thank you so much for sharing this 🙂 It's not an easy thing to do, but makes a world of difference for people going though/who have gone through similar things to know that they're not alone x

  11. During my second year of studying I was in a bit of a rush to finish my studies, now that I've written my last exam for my undergrad studies my heart bleeds when I think that I won't be on campus anymore, I wouldn't say I'm anxious, just saddened by the thought of leaving my beloved University Of Johannesburg (I'm South African by the way)

  12. I went to the ER yesterday because I felt like I was going to die, I was on my way to the grocery store with my mom and I got this impending doom and drove right to the ER, it was so scary, it was spontaneous and I was like what is going on with my body!? It freaked me out, my dad died about two months ago and other life crisis, I thought I was fine and I can handle it but I also heard its subconscious, meaning it would be spontaneous, it's so scary, doctor had me see a heart specialist because during the anxiety I had tachycardia and I woke up with morning with rapid heart rate, so I don't kno what's going on with me, if it's anxiety then I would feel much better because I kno it is possible to get through it

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