Is Your Therapist a KNOW IT ALL? | Kati Morton

Hey, everybody. Happy Monday. Now, today’s question is why
do mental health professionals feel like they have to know everything? And I really, really love this question, because it caused me to
reflect on my own process, and how I am with my
patients, and with you, and I have a lot of thoughts about this. And my first thought is that this urge could come from us feeling responsible for you getting better. Meaning we feel like we have
to fix everything that’s wrong, or whatever you’ve come to
us to quote unquote fix. And this really says that we
don’t have healthy boundaries, and I’ve talked a lot about this, but I think many people don’t understand the boundaries in therapy,
so I’ll briefly go over that. When you come to see a therapist, I know it can feel really weird, but you’re not supposed to
know anything about them. Yes, I mean, if they’re pregnant, you obviously see that,
it’s there, you know. Or if they wear a wedding
ring, or mention their husband, or wife, or partner, you’re
gonna hear about that too. But it should be very, very minimal. You shouldn’t know if they’ve
been in therapy themselves, or if their other spouse,
or they’ve been divorced, their other spouse is an alcoholic. You shouldn’t know all that about them. Every once and awhile, a therapist can share their own experience as a way to empathize with you, so that you really know that they get it. Do you know what I mean? And so, it can be a way for us
to help you in your process. Everything that we share
should be with you in mind. And so, therapy really works because you share what’s important, and what you want to work on, and the goals that you’re working towards, and then, I, or any other therapist, helps kind of guide you
in the right direction. We ask questions that can get
to the root of the problem, or we ask kind of other questions to best navigate through to
even figure out what’s going on. Does that make sense? We kinda just ask a lot of questions, so that we can get down
to what’s truly happening, and help you heal it, but we can’t work harder
than our patients. And that’s where this kind of comes in where there’s no boundaries. It’s like, I can’t be
putting in all this effort, and striving to make you feel better, because I don’t have that kinda power. I can’t make anybody get better. We all know this, right? All we can do is check in, I can be there, I can support when you need to, I can give you some tools,
and things, techniques to use when you’re out of my office, but you have to want to do the work. I can’t do it for you. And so, I feel like some therapists may feel like they need
to know everything, and do everything, because they’ve taken
on that responsibility, when it’s actually our
patient’s responsibility. Now, my second thought
is that this could come from us being too
confident, or egotistical. I actually find this more, and I’m not like, calling
anybody out by name, or any type of mental health
professional as being bad, but I find this more when
it comes to psychiatrists, M.D.s, meaning medical doctors. A lot of them, because they
spent so much time in school, and they usually did
really well in school, and they are like, the top, I
mean it’s the most education in the mental health professional realm that you can get to, right? That’s like, as high as you can go. And so, I think sometimes, people in that level can
be really egotistical, or overly confident, thinking
that they know everything. And that honestly is kind of icky, and usually we can feel that in session, and that might be why
this question was asked, is ’cause their therapist, or
psychiatrist, or psychologist, or social worker, whomever, tends to act like they
have all the answers, but I just think that is
bred out of the personality of the type of person you’re seeing. And that’s why it’s really
important to make sure that you like your therapist,
you feel like they get you, they’re not making these
horrible assumptions, or talking throughout the session. That’s also a bad thing is
if your therapist talks, even if it’s not about themselves, if they just like, try
to fix your problem, and talk it through, and
you barely get to talk, that’s not good. You’re supposed to share information, we’re supposed to ask, you
know, kinda guiding questions to get you towards what
we think the answer is, but if you’re like that’s
not working for me, we try something else. And so, it’s really important, I think, for all mental health
professionals to be humble, and to know that their
patients are the teachers, and we’re kind of the student. I’m the student of you experience, right? You’re teaching me all about it, and being too confident or egotistical could lead to me thinking
that I have all the answers, when in truth, my patient
has all the answers. I just know how to take
what they’ve told me, and offer some helpful tools and tips that might work for them, but again, they only
know what works for them. So, I’m gonna offer all the
things I have in my arsenal, so that I can see what would work, but at the end of the day,
the patient is the expert. And my third thought about why a therapist could feel like they
have to know everything is that they could worry about you having confidence in them, and needing their patients to validate, or affirm their own insecurities. And this really just goes back to a video I created a long time ago about why I think all
mental health professionals should see their own therapist, or other mental health professional, because what that reeks of to me is like, countertransference, or
some kind of transference, depending on what’s going
in the therapy session. It’s kind of hard to pin that down, but I shouldn’t, as a therapist, be working out my ownish in session. That time is yours, and it is sacred, and it’s the one hour, of 50 minutes, that you get each and every week to talk about your own stuff,
and not be interrupted. And so, a therapist may
come across as like, feeling like they know everything, because they want you to feel confident, and I really think that this reason would be born out of their desire to help, and their worry maybe, or
their own impostor syndrome, but again, stuff that
they should be workin’ out on their own. Why are we having to deal with this? We shouldn’t. That’s why I see a therapist, so I keep my ownish out my sessions, you know, ’cause it doesn’t belong there. And my fourth, because like I said, I have a lot of thoughts, my fourth thought about this is that they
may need the money, and wanna keep you as a patient. And that’s part of the reason why I’ve actually never done
private practice full time. I don’t know if any of you know that. I’ve always done it just an add on to something else I’ve been
doing, whether I was working at the eating disorder treatment center, I used to be per diem around, there was a local hospital chain in L.A., I had three different hospitals I would attend to every week, I ran groups, things like that, I’ve run other groups on the side with other colleagues of mine, I’ve done a lot of different things. Now, I do YouTube as an add on. But I do that all because I don’t want that direct relationship where
you see someone for an hour, and they pay you for it. I don’t want to ever feel like, shit, if I lose this patient, I can’t pay my bills, or my rent, or let’s say, you know, can’t
get groceries, I don’t know, because bills keep coming. We all know that. I never wanted that to be it. I always wanted to have
another thing going that was a little bit different that paid the base of what I needed, and then all of the money that I made from my patients in my private practice was just icing on the cake, which allowed me to
take clients at no cost, or a lesser cost, you know, like the sliding
scale I’ve talked about. You can always ask them if they do that. And so, I feel like some
therapists may pretend they know everything, or act
like they have all the answers, because they want to keep you around, because maybe they need the money, and that’s an unfortunate
potential side effect of this whole thing that we call therapy. And my fifth thought, I’ve kind of touched on this a
little throughout the others, but we could not be
taking care of ourselves, and dealing with our own
issues in your session, like I talk about, imposter syndrome, or working too much, symptoms
of burnout showing through. If you remember, I did this
whole series on burnout, but some of the symptoms are irritability, struggle to sleep, they can
begin to resent their patients. I mean, we talked about
burnout comes from nurses at a free clinic in New York
in 1974, I think it was? 72? Dr.Herbert Freudenberger,
he coined the term burnout, because he was seeing it in his nurses. And, so you just think about that, and I think that’s why
it’s so, so important that therapists see their own therapists, because we don’t have all the answers, and especially, I can’t
therapize myself, I’m sorry. That’s just not gonna work. It’s like a surgeon trying to
operate on themself, ya can’t. It’s just not right, because I can sidestep all those questions that I’d rather avoid. Or I can pretend
something’s not a big deal, ’cause I’m not ready to deal with it, and you really need a therapist to kinda push you through that. And so, that’s why it’s so important if we are in a job of caring
for others in any way, we need to first care for ourselves, and so, that could be one of the reasons why whoever asked this question is feeling like their therapist, or other
mental health professional is just kind of overly confident, and pretending like they know everything. And finally, and this also
includes like, all of the above, they need to suck at their jobs. Not all therapists or other
mental health professionals are good at what they do. Not all people get into our
line of work to help people. Be humble, and let our
patients teach us, guide us, and show us where they want to go. And so, just keep that in mind. Just like any other job, and I know sometimes it’s hard to consider being a therapist as a job,
or a career path, but it is. And just like you can
get a shitty haircut, or you can have someone come
over to clean your carpets, and they only do like, 3/4 of it, or any number of things, right? We can go to a mechanic, and our car turns out worse than it was. People can suck at their jobs, and therapists unfortunately,
are not immune to that. And overall, the important
thing to remember is that mental health
professionals are people too. We can’t know everything, we can’t specialize in
every mental illness, or read your minds. That would be really
helpful, but we can’t. But with the right therapist
for you, you’ll know this, you can tell them what’s going on, and what you want to work on, set some goals together,
and work towards them, because no one said
therapy was gonna be easy. But they did say that it
would be totally worth it. I hope you found this helpful, and I would actually be
interested in your thoughts. Do you think I covered all the reasons a therapist could feel like
they have to know everything? This was really fun to think about, and really great reflection for me. So, thank you for asking
your wonderful questions. If you have any other thoughts, leave ’em in the comments down below, and I will see you next time. Bye. (smooth music)

100 comments

  1. Thanks for the video! I don’t believe that I can fix myself—I’m an idiot. I know absolutely nothing, and I need someone to save me. That’s what I thought a therapist was for. Why am I so invisible? Does anyone hear me?

  2. one of my therapist's favorite sayings for me was: "if you don't succeed try doing what your therapist said in the first place" . If I succeed it's due to listening to their suggestion, if I fail I should've listened to them… wait, so how do I succeed?

  3. As a teacher I am a bit jealous. Reason being is I work with difficult students and yet I am responsible for their learning way more than they are. So when they don't try and get the material I am made to feel responsible. Yes, I love what I do. I would just like the onus to also be on them. Hope no one is mad for what I wrote. Kati Morton rocks.

  4. This was such an honest answer! I really appreciate your willingness to be real and authentic. You have spent the last idk 6+ years learning about mental health with us and teaching at the same time! So cool!

  5. I have a question about sociopaths. What happens when a sociopath meets another sociopath? Do they try and manipulate each other? Do they know that the other is a sociopath??

  6. I know so much about my therapist, I also love her and appreciate her for how much shes helped me. But I did all the work lol

  7. Great video, Kati.

    I wonder if you are fully conscious that in creating it you promote a certain view of what therapy is and of what it should pursue. That is enlightening in and of itself, and to an extent, even reassuring.

  8. I know we shouldn't know anything about our Therapist, but I feel a CERTAIN TYPE OF WAY about receiving Therapy from someone who has never had Therapy themselves. EVERYONE can benefit from the process of Therapy and I don't feel right receiving Therapy from someone who won't undergo Therapy themselves. Even if they do not feel like it is necessary, they should be receiving Therapy themselves, at least seldomly, if they want to be at work with something as fragile as the Human Mind. We don't need someone 'Who knows all the answers and did EVERYTHING RIGHT IN LIFE to tell us just how to do it ALL RIGHT, like THEM' that is not what therapy is about or for.

  9. Hi Katie great topic. Being from a small town most of what you said stands out quite a bit, because of the amount of education they have. There's also the opposite of the money issues you mentioned where they're the only therapist within an area & have no fear of losing their patients.

  10. Hi Kati , thanks for the info , I too believe we need those boundaries in place , especially in therapy . As you have stated before " the more we tell our therapist , the more they can help " . So true and this video stems to the whole purpose of seeing a therapist , your getting help , by trusting them with your info !! You don`t see a therapist to help them !! Take care , Gary  XOXO

  11. Brief question about boundaries: Over the course of about 3 years, my therapist has shared stuff infrequently and it always makes me uncomfortable because I know I should know very little about her. For instance, I know that her son is quiet like me and a virgin (shared in the context of my lack of sexual experience despite being 27), I know that she doesn't like journaling because all her entries are about how tired she feels because she only journals when she's tired (shared after I said the journalling process often makes me more upset). When we ground at the beginning of a session, she often says it's good for her too.

    Overall, she's been a huge support and the thought of leaving her makes me scared. She's spent 3 years getting to know me and I can't just recreate that right away with someone else. I feel she cares about me. These experiences are the exception, not the norm. Should I tell her or should I leave because she should just know? Or are these just some of the pros/cons that every therapist has. Thanks in advance!

  12. I stopped going to my therapist because she made me feel like she had formed this opinion on me and won't really listen to what i have to say. She kept insisting on things that did not work for me, and every meeting felt like she was getting to the same "breakthrough" she did the last time. Instead of helping my mental health – it just made me feel blame and worry for wasting money for my parents, and it made me feel like i am too complicated for anyone to really understand whats going on in my brain. I know she had no bad intentions, but still – it makes me angry.

  13. Hi Kati! – How do you feel about therapists who will only see you every two weeks? How much progress do you feel that a client and therapist can make only seeing each other every two weeks?

  14. Hi Kati,

    So is it crossing boundaries if a therapist helps you join a class, to find out its a class they go to themselves?. Also that they have passed information on to the class leader that they have a client joining and there name? Are they a loud to tell you how they feel, tell you that they have broken rules? Only then try to retract everything that they have said, to then suggest that they think they might have missed something that is deep seated, with no explanation why they suddenly think this, and wait till the very last ending session as well.

    Thank you. 😊

  15. I think my therapist is the smartest one out there outside of you Kati! She’s a lot like you! But she’s awesome! I like this though because I know she’s smart and has taken real interest and care in what she learned in becoming a professional, but I do not feel like she answers my questions in a condescending way or whatever. In fact, I feel empowered with how she responds to me. So, I do feel like she knows everything – she would probably kill me for saying that. But like, not in a bad way. I feel that way because I do think she has taken the time to really understand the mental health things I struggle with. And its never in a bad way…if that makes sense.

  16. The one time my therapist revealed a bit about herself was when I asked her "Why do you do this job? Do you really care about me?" (bit of a raw, honest moment). She answered that she had been in a similar situation to the women she worked with (abusive relationships), and had come through it with help and learning boundaries and rights and tools, and wanted to help other women learn healthy boundaries and their rights in relationships and to move through trauma. She said she deeply cared about me, and all her clients.
    She has pretty good boundaries though, she keeps most heavy conversation to in session, won't get into issues in email, and encourages me to use the tools I have and other people in my support network between sessions.

  17. This sounded very comprehensive to me. Thanks, Katie! 🙂

    I had the opposite problem whenever I sought out therapy in the past. I get therapists who won't say anything, and after a few sessions they tell me there's nothing wrong with me and I don't need therapy. Okay. That's always nice to hear, but when I've gone I did it for a reason. They never would suggest any helpful steps to take or ways I could improve my mental health. As it turns out, I was wonky from my thyroid dying, so maybe they were right. It was a physical issue causing emotional disturbances, and therapy just wouldn't help with that. I actually do feel good these days, but it was very frustrating at the time to hear them say I was normal when I felt like something was wrong. At least I'm good now. 🙂

  18. I've recently started dating someone who I temporarily see for therapy. Is that weird? She wasn't my therapist for very long just while my main therapist was out of town. Meet her on a dating site and didn't really recognize one another till later. Can you please comment on the subject? Also greetings from Montana!!!

  19. Hi Kati,I was thinking of how you said that therapists are not supposed to talk much about themselves.
    What if my support worker tells me about deaths in her family & then told me about a suicide of another client an how it happened??Its really messed with my head.
    How can I deal with it??

  20. I’ve had three therapists, two were/are great and incredibly helpful. The other one was always trying to solve my problems—telling me I should get out of a relationship because I “shouldn’t waste my youth on an unavailable guy” and pushing me to move out of my parents house. The second was something I wanted to do, but I didn’t need her tell me what to do.

  21. It's as the old joke goes – Q: How many therapists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, but the lightbulb has to really want to change

  22. I really enjoyed this question. It helps me see where my therapist is coming from. She don't ask like she has all of the answers but i know she knows more than she letting on. It helps me come to a solution. I love how you say some therapist suck at there job. Therapist like to blame it on there clients. When does the client becomes an issue in therapy? Besides not wanting to take medicine?

  23. I've always found my psychologist distant. It's so true, she never referred to her personal life. Now that I'm down to my last sessions, I told her I was going to miss her. She didn't respond, but that's okay. I understand why. Thank you for this video. 👍

  24. I told a sister of mine what you are saying Kati that you cannot know the out come. That a therapist is a person and as much as you might care you can do nothing the client has to. She has doctorate in psychology now. However she disagreed with me? She believes I know nothing to this day and actually is quite mentally ill herself to be honest. She doesn't practice because of coarse she is till having a difficult time . Here it is dinner time busy day Anyway I am making a little progress with family well I hope It has been to toxic you know? I am talking to a sister finally and we are talking about meeting and more I hope fun. Life needs to move on after such a long time ( 4 sisters 1 brother) I can see we were supposed to know too Dad was a know it all and very frightening if you crossed his 'knowing' My parents had definate narcissitic leanings although at heart i think that they could have gotten better but sadly * never sought help . PS I want a vacation you bet* lol seriously

  25. My clinical psychologist is definitely egotistical, a professional snob as I call her as she is forever telling me how she’s better than the counsellor I saw. I think she feels threatened because she knows I don’t like her and have a good relationship with the counsellor. NHS so I am stuck with her 🙄.

  26. Kati you are one of best mental health professionals in the business today. You are authentic the real deal. I recently graduated as a therapist and your advice and information in this video is spot on. I hope I get to talk to you one day in person about certain mental health information. Thank you Kati for all you do in the mental health sector.

  27. I agree with you, Kati. Life's messy anyway. And if I'm the one who's seeking help with an issue, I feel that I need to be willing to get my hands dirty (proverbially), and to put in work myself. It's a 2 person job, with me (as the patient) putting in the most work. Otherwise, it's not only a waist of my time for seeking the advice, it's a waist of the person's time who I'm seeking help from. Time is more finite than money … you can't deposit it in an account, and you don't get it back.

  28. Is kind of what Im feeling/going throu right now. Cause… I think i MIGHT have ED BUT i dont tell anything to my terapist. This makes me think that If she is not finding it by herself/since she is the professional and knows everything… I might just be alright and just making it up by myself. Idk. I might just be someone like a lot of people that worry about appearance and weight. Because again my own therapist is not catching it.

  29. So informative Kati once again. I'm off to see a therapist soon, first time in over 20 years. I was feeling uneasy about it, but after seeing this video I feel more at ease about it.

  30. Awesome video Kati,you're my inspiration,love it when you upload new video,because of you I got back into my short film projects,now my channel is growing up fast,kindly you can stop by and check me out sometime!

  31. Do you have any colleagues in Phoenix AZ that you would reccomend for anger and depression issues? I have tried 4 different therapy places and just have not felt like it was ever a right fit… I got the feeling quite often that there was no interest in helping…

  32. Great video, all of our caregivers are people too, with their own boundaries and their own issues. Please be understanding that they are just people too, we are ALL human, flaws are humanity! I love my caregivers (therapist, meds, ARMHS) they all have a life outside of their work too, I like to respect their boundaries and give them their space as well. Like when I'm out shopping, don't try to unload your issues, they're not on the job and getting paid at this time, they are just going about their lives like we are! Respect them. They need their own time just as we do! 🙂 There will be a better relationship if they know they won't get bombarded every time they see you out and about <3 🙂

  33. I've had the same therapist for eight years now and basically works on trauma. I also have a caseworker and psychiatrist to help with my other issues because I was finally diagnosed with bipolar1…. so my caseworker wanted to communicate with my therapist naturally to see where I am at what I am working on and all that good stuff. So now I find myself questioning if I should have let my caseworker and therapist communicate because I am being told by my therapist that she thinks my caseworker is worried that I may be stuck and may want me to try something else…. plus a lot of my issues are from the trauma and my diagnosis. I am confused and cant seem to figure out what happened. I feel lost and scared. I am not sure why this happened because I do have trauma I have PTSD and that's what my therapist specializes in. Maybe you can help me understand what's happening. Maybe because I am having mixed episodes I just cant take it all in. Please help me see where this coming from because I am too afraid to ask although I know I can ask or say what I feel. I should mention that I am having a lot of changes in my mental health support system. Is this an ego thing?

  34. I almost didn’t click on this one because I didn’t think I could relate. But soooo interesting!! 🙋🏻‍♀️

  35. Hey kati can you do a video on emotional detachment and desensitization. I think im going to get diagnosed with soon and i would like to know some more information on it.

  36. One possibility in my opinion is the therapist is simulating a personality type to elicit a response or practice a response. This would encourage the patient to deal with "this type" of person. It is always more wise to engage in role play clearly and openly, but I can see how therapy can be an unscripted test also. Always be open and honest with your therapist, if they do something you think is nonsense call them on it and listen for what they say. Don't be afraid to speak your mind as a patient.

  37. I'm not comfortable that my therapist has a Facebook and that we have 3 mutual friends showing on her page. There isn't a lot of personal info and I wouldn't try to contact her or friend her but I still feel weird just looking at her page.

  38. Thank you for you! I was wondering if you had or could do a video on being with a ‘dark seeker’? Someone that is still hurt by the wrong their partner did but wants to work it out.

  39. Thanks for this video! It helps me a lot. I just finished college few months ago, and I've been thinking about this pretty much, like do I have to know everything ? Because there's a lot of things in psychology and in humans behavior in general, just thanks. 💕

  40. How do you know if it's time to see a therapist? Which is more helpful a therapist or a psychiatrists? Can medicines really helpful? How do you know when patients need to take medicines or therapy will work best? Major life stressful events such as stress of media and struggles in life like financial problems can a therapist would be helpful or medicines would work best? We all have struggles in life but different experiences and difficulties. Is there any low cost free counseling services here in the Philippines? I think a counselor would be very helpful, a therapist that can explain and advise you on how can you manage to cope up with our daily life situations. Such as giving instructions on how to deal with your major life problems? An online support system like online therapy in times of distress, it would be very helpful if you have someone who can talk to. Someone who could understand in a non judgemental manner. Sometimes all we need is someone who could talk and get opinions or a counseling session. Unfortunately there are no free counseling services available here. A psychiatrists cannot tell you everything you need to know, they set limitations and boundaries. They can't answer all your questions, some details that the patient would be best not to know. Some people are good in making a reverse psychology, dancing with the flow of your mood such as a psychiatrists. It would be very insane to think that some family members or neighbors is going with the flow of your mood or making a reverse psychology. If psychiatrist refuses to answer your questions and is not willing to open up, would you consider to take a second opinion, because the question is an integral part of you being sane. It's a form of disturbing thought, questions that badly need an answers. The human mind is so complex, the thought makes you dysfunctional, what would you do? I can't afford to get a therapist and the psychiatrist refuses to open up what would you do? I can't force her if she doesn't want to open up. I guess she is not a prudent doctor, she can't protect her patients, she thinks that the immediate solution to the problem is solely the medicines but I need more than that. I need a counselor who could help me answer all the questions. The problem is not me because I follow her instructions but she doesn't want to explain and open up. Could you please advice me Madam Kati Morton what should I do with my problems? Sometimes all we need is a counselor or an advice coming from a professional perspective, different opinions, an intelligent mind who could explain. What can you advice regarding my concerns Miss kati Morton? If the psychiatrist is not being helpful, would you consider seeking second opinion? Thank you.

  41. I mentioned that I was old school and I'm use to talking about the deep dark past. My therapist says, " You don't think we are going to do that do you?" I left so frustrated.

  42. What is the diagnostic criteria for ISH? Does it happen more in cities or coastal regions? It seems in motivational areas, tone and how you say something is really important. It’s difficult, but in trying to talk to anyone about anything that can be where things sometimes fall apart and it’s probably a pitfall to learn to avoid if it conflicts with goals. It’s funny that we know this, but still have difficulty avoiding it no matter what we know. Maybe sometimes people have differing strategy, but other than that I guess everyone is really just human, huh?

  43. I once went to a councilor who upon out first session, said I might have either: depression, anxiety disorder, OCD, ASD and I'm not exempt from having two of those at the same time. I never went back to him.

  44. I've been to a therapist who talked to get me comfortable to talk to him about issues since I couldn't think of everything at once. Sometimes I'd forget what I was trying to explain mid sentence and he made me feel…idk better about it? Gave me tools and tricks which help a bit but I have to carry a notebook around at work to keep track of things.

    My therapist before made me feel uncomfortable and nervous and asked about stuff that made things worse. Basically told me I had depression and that's why I have memory problems. But oddly enough he guilted me and scared me out of a specialist to see why. Be so careful when finding a therapist…

  45. I have been so blessed and lucky to have two amazing therapists in my eating disorder journey and I am so grateful that the boundaries have stayed healthy and that I have gotten a lot out of it over the years.

  46. I am lucky to have finally found a great therapist through college and my adult life. However, I've been to a few that were just downright awful. It's so true that not everybody is good at their job. If you've been to a therapist and had a bad experience I would encourage you to see another one before you give up on therapy. One guy I saw told me very awkwardly that he would ignore me in public if he saw me and always looked shocked when I would tell him about something that happened in my life. I also had another therapist try to push her own religious agenda on me and tell me all these religious books I needed to read. Therapy in Alabama is hard! I love where I go now and it's LGBTQ friendly and some of the best therapists I've ever met.

  47. Listening to your audiobook Are u ok?! these days. Very insightful and hearing u narrate it is very soothing on its own 👍
    I'm hooked on to u and your channel.
    I'm in therapy myself.

  48. No healthcare professional knows everything there is about medicine, not even physicians. That is why there are sub-specialities in medicine and within the realm of healthcare in general bc of how vast the field is.
    (With new research released on nearly a daily basis, it’s important to stay updated on such new findings)

  49. I’ve had a therapist who acted kinda condescending, and dropped an interpretation that was accurate but one that I wasn’t ready for at the time. I think he lacked experience to know when to withhold information and was very much a stickler for the psychological self-assessments. My current therapist is willing to be honest with me about when she doesn’t know something and never gives me something that I’m not ready for.

  50. How can I stop being a know-it-all? I'm afraid I have this trait. I am really intuitive, but sometimes I can be too bold. I would love some advice and cues to watch out for!

  51. My therapist didn't understand when I said I feel an inability to feel any excitement about anything anymore and I feel I can never feel romantic love.
    Talked like they were telling me off 🙄

  52. this is an important topic. i was looking for a therpaist recently and since it is my first time, i tried to understand how it works in where i live. Unfortunately, it seems most people did not like how it works, as it is mostly religious based and they do not have a 50 minute timeframe, but rather 15 to 30 minutes. I thought they were psychiatrists, but i guess they are pyshcologists! it made me very frustrated and now i dont want to go to one to council.

  53. Hey Kati! I have a question. A friend of mine is finally starting to be more honest with herself and us (=her friends) about how she is doing and how she might need help.
    A huge obstacle for her, however, is that she studied psychology. She thinks that she should know or does know everything about her and/or that another therapist couldn't help her. (or at least she seems to think so.)
    I really want to help her, but I'm at a loss. I am aware that someone has to get to the point of reaching out for help for themselves and that nobody can force them. Nor do I want to. But I was just wondering if you have some tips on how to get her a little more on board on the idea of going to therapy, and to help her overcome that obstacle of thinking that 'she should know it all'.

    I'd appreciate it a lot!

  54. I need somone to talk to but i want to talk to the theipist online i really do need somone to talk to really bad i try to kill myself 2 times already

  55. Hi Katie, my counselor brought up something known as Sexual Anorexia, and I was wondering if It was a real thing in the mental health and psychiatric community, and do you see it in your patients? If so, what can we do to treat it!? Thanks!

  56. what should i do if i feel like my therapist is sharing a little too much with me? she tells me stories about her siblings, her past relationships, her issues growing up…. and i hate admitting this but i get really frustrated after my sessions because i feel like half of my time with her was spent listening to her and having to sympathize with her (idk if that makes sense). my parents really like her so they won’t let me look for a new therapist, but the sessions don’t help one bit because i never have time to actually talk about anything in depth with her. is there a way for me to talk to her about this without making it seem like i don’t care about what’s going on in her life? sorry this ended up being super long ahahah

  57. KATIE please help. Can you do a video relating people who base their lives on relationships, I have not been single in like a decade and it seems like every guys I meet is “the one” how do I stop myself from being like this I know it’s unhealthy but I seem to always fall into a relationship one after the other or create a future in my head with someone new

  58. If autism is just a difference, then what are the problems that neurotypicals face as individuals that autistic people do not struggle with, and not how they act towards autistic people?

  59. Hi Katie, I have a quick question. I sometimes get annoyed at tiny things people around me do and I say something mean or snarky because it's like I can't help it from coming out. And it generally happens after someone does something nice for me. Like today, my mom bought me some groceries and on the way home she was saying she was tired. (She says this everyday, without fail, for as long as I can remember btw) I told her off for always complaining and then felt instant regret. This can happen numerous times a day, everyday of the week sometimes. Some weeks it doesn't happen a lot. Is this a sign of mental illness or am I just an impatient person sometimes?
    Thanks

  60. I feel like my confidence is really low. My therapist is amazing and I wouldn’t trade her for anyone else. She has told me some personal stuff about herself but she can relate to me.

  61. My first therapist kinda just seemed bored and indifferent and our chats about my traumas where very downgraded like she didnt know what to say. I didn't feel like she was a professional more like a friend who wouldve told me to go seek help

  62. The more I see of your videos the more I realise that my psychologist are really really good!! But can you go to the same psychologist for a to long time? I’ve been going to mine in over five years. But we work really good on my problems. But are five years a to long time with the same psychologist?

  63. I know that this will sound a bit sudden, but I was wondering if you still recommend a emotions wheel of some sort. One of your videos mentions it and talks about finding a version of it in your website, but that seems to no longer be the case.

  64. I'd love your thoughts on therapists using toxic positivity, I know they shouldn't but I know one that does and sees nothing wrong with it, even though she's been asked not to. Love your videos 😊

  65. My Consultant clinical psychologist, that I spent a year in trauma training with, did come across as eminently knowledgeable, but I somehow desperately wanted more guidance, more answers. It felt , and not for the 1st time, that I desperately wanted them to explain to me, they clearly did have alot of the answers- I wanted in on them!!! Does that make sense? I have Cptsd and bipolar type 1 (and now fibromyalgia) following abuse.

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