MAN FALLS IN LOVE WITH HIS CAR! I Jacksepticeye's f̶u̶n̶n̶i̶e̶s̶t̶ Cringiest Home Videos



it's cold so very cold it's been a long time since I've been here family what is this place there's no memory of this what's behind this I remember I remember Oh everybody welcome back to jacksepticeye's Funniest Home Videos I finally remembered it's been a long time since I've done one of these videos so I didn't remember how to do it I didn't even remember my own name this morning Jacques Shawn that doesn't sound right it's been so long but I can't even remember how to do this what what do we say again we had a catchphrase for this show but I can't remember what it is craft top of the mark now that's super funny there was something on the board to tell me it's just empty oh that's what it was it was laughs lost the power I don't have it anymore I didn't even knock off any markers what's the point of this anymore why am I here crazy I'm here because I have a strange addiction I have an addiction to making YouTube videos I have an addiction to telling people to subscribe to jacksepticeye I have an addiction to laughing I have an addiction to entertaining for all for all of you it's been so long my elves are probably out there dead somewhere at this point I don't know if they didn't bring me this clip I brought myself this clip this is my strange addictions you've all heard of these before maybe if you haven't let me enlighten you so my strange addiction is a show that talks about people who have strange addictions no not giant heads what some of these addictions range from needing to sniff baby's heads to wanting to punch a tree every time you are played there could be anything it's just a strange addiction so I went online found a compilation and we're going to go through this today it's gonna be funny okay are you all ready to what was it again uh-oh the powers back but at what cost alright contestant number the first what is your strange addiction come on down from the aisles all the way from Bedford Virginia is that Virginia I don't know Bedford vocal actress voice actor it's just a roundabout way of saying that whatever what's your strange addiction Sarita I'm 44 years old I live in Bedford Virginia pretty day today and I'm addicted to eating rocks okay like I know my strange addiction I knew that it was going to be something weird like they could be addicted to crocheting their dog's face into a pillow addicted to spitting everywhere when they do YouTube videos that's my strange addiction it's not that strange I'm very loud and very explosive oh it wasn't so much like I eat rocks I was like okay that's weird but hearing her crunch on rocks as someone who values their teeth and didn't take care of them very well when I was younger I probably should have take care of your teeth kids okay please for the love of God you you're really regretted otherwise but ah I can't even handle when somebody like bites into a fork after like somebody picks up a piece of food puts the fork in their mouth and goes and then you hear it I would be able to function every day if I didn't eat some quality of rock oh no that's pretty added in later I don't know this could be fake a real I'm gonna treat it as real because here on the internet everything is real if you hear it or see it or watch it on the internet it's the same as saying everything is real here so I'm just gonna assume this is real and that's gross I don't know smooth Teresa has been addicted to eating rocks for more than 20 years yes she was initially attracted to the earthy smell okay Teresa what in the ever-loving TLC is that all about how can you be attracted to the smell of earth oh who are these not so good yeah I get it don't you don't need to explain things to me in the comments okay it's all jokes it's all it's a show that's not even real it's all paper I was just out walking one day I had no intention of biting into it or chewing it but I did and once I did that I was hooked on them now you can't go more than a few hours without eating rocks oh it's the grittiness of it and the earthy taste actually like how it feels on my teeth when I'm crunching them up no I'm the complete opposite this is just gonna have to be called jacksepticeye's cringy as home videos this is not gonna be good we're already off to a banger cuz I hate anything like ah anything that's the feeling of like rocks like scraping rocks or like dry wood against my teeth or something it just makes me want to it makes me better Pontchartrain sorry again very fired up about this for no reason but that's no I don't like that way of reacting is I can't even make this funny because my brain is just being like no turn it off switch it off go watch the runo oh we're already moving on oh okay well oh these are gonna be some freaking crackers at this point well the first one in I didn't even laugh once alright that's that's a zero on the laugh board a 5 out of 5 and the cringe scale but 0 out of 5 from the laugh scale wait I I was just about to say please let tell me you mean the manga or the animate you just love to go sit down and watch it but no you're just like actual bleach please don't tell me you drink this I don't even think you can have an addiction to drinking bleach that's called dead at 28 because I love myself good for you alright I forget your name already because I'm so preoccupied with rock eating and bleach drinking well you're not drinking the bleach actually which is a good sign again you would just die I'd imagine but the smell of bleach though just maybe she just gets high every day Gloria cleans her house top to bottom with bleach okay I was through more than 300 gallons every year beliefs has ruined her clothes and damaged furniture yeah too much bleach will do that bleach has ruined her life but just she's still addicted to it there's been times where I walked in the house and bleach does it bleaches me I'll just laugh in her face one time I walked into the house and bleach was on the TV that was like go do you have a problem ichigo's not real every morning Gloria now adds bleach to her bath water no first of all take a shower instead of a bath cuz you well you're just about to talk about and I'm interrupting you more than I should be haha please stay with me okay just take a shower you're destroying the environment with all these baths you're just wasting all this water but also I was gonna say listen bleach on your skin like really bad I mean maybe she washes it off pretty quick afterwards but bleach on your skin would burn Oh an aura BAM I have any reason no my first one in the water and then I take the bleach in I poured in a tub it's not a certain amount that I use I'll just pour until I feel like I said oh well at least she's gonna be clean that's the one thing to take away from all of this despite the fact that she might be high as a kite all day every day because the smell of bleach just going into your brain like that can't be good yes I know smells don't go into your brain you know what I mean maybe I've been sniffing too much bleach part of me hopes that these are just fake that it just looks like it is what it is because it's good television but like I said she said it it's on the Internet therefore it's real okay okay I just I tubs meme just shove it up for no reason and this okay put in your choices now is that is that just a meme for transitions sake or is it in foreshadowing for the next clip is Nathaniel go to be addicted to being gay I don't think that that's the thing or is he going to be addicted to means could be either of the two at this point 27 years old and serious relationship with michael [Applause] [Applause] secret answer none of the ones I picked oh I've read fanfiction like this I've played a game like this where the dude was jerking off his care no Nathaniel I clicked in this video and all I wanted to do was laugh but I can this is too much a serious relationship with you care he he was like full-on frenching his car are we gonna see him with his pants down behind the car near the exhaust pipe in a few minutes if Daniel is in a committed relationship with a car that he's named chase he met chase in a resale lot about five years ago okay okay that was it that's all right oh god everyone at home now I was like it's chase Brodie he's in love with chase Brodie bro average no tumblr this is not canon okay put your fingers down I kind of want to see more of Nathaniel story but I kind of don't at the same time it was weirding Mia also a car can't consent to a relationship Theresa's favorite type of rock is a mixture of several knives including granite okay we're back – Theresa uses a hammer to break them up into bite-sized pieces she doesn't earlier she had a hole in geode and she was just stuffing her face with do you want to come over for dinner No thank you I have my rock this is about the size I like it because it's not as hard to swallow God would normally take that second sort of context I normally just put it in my mouth or my Nonna or just put the whole piece of a mouse okay take this entire section out of context but picture is supers are what is happening do you ever just stop and think every now and then either me doing this video are you guys watching it that this is technically my job right now I'm working sorry guys I can't go out and do a cool thing tonight I have work a little weird getting stopped at the border coming into America they're like so what do you do for work huh it's actually making me gag boy oh stop it Tereza and get that birthday taste off of it just go eat a bucket of sand or something some chewing up rocks and destroying your teeth my name is Jesse Campbell and I'm addicted to Minecraft this one has to be fake there's no way this one's real did whoever edit this compilation just throw this in here I mean don't get me wrong addiction to video games is a thing that people talk about and some people have I mean been there bro minecraft addiction that's epic this one has to be fake it's shot completely differently dad were the diamond Minecraft so he did a diamond dad can't get any cooler than that hey what's up my name is Sean I'm 14 years old and I have an addiction to Fortnight never seen so he got into for tonight I just couldn't stop dropping he tilted and dancing on some noobs the floss is my favorite times because I think it's really unique I knew I was pretty fresh untight famous Heather I'm 43 mom of two beautiful children and I'm addicted to drinking paint okay it's a roller coaster every time it starts off like oh that's pretty normal nice happy family and suddenly it's just like oh there it is that's why we're watching as it's going down your throat it feels very nice and warm almost like a thicker version of warm milk Emily it's got that very strong chemical taste to it I just like milk yeah but strong chemical taste that you're tasting is called poisoning you're not supposed to drink paint it goes in the wall that doesn't have to paint your insights his body and then his interior I'll go back to Nathaniel seem to fit that just felt an instant connection Nathaniel's obsession first developed as a teenager when he would build model cars but he didn't find a true love until he met chase I find this part of him the most sexy just because the subtle lines and curves he'll getting the kiss here we always have such a good time together yeah I don't want to see that it's too it's too real I don't see like his tongue touch the car before his lips – ah this is not safe for work he likes a lot of the same music I do yeah cuz you put the beers again and he just plays it he loves it just I feel bad for laughing at this they shouldn't be laughing at this cuz if this is real and the dude actually loves the care technically he's not hurting anybody no no harm is being done to this it's it's just really really strange my strange addiction is all full circle oh no oh no times when we get sexual Oh No you pay me what we do the most often I like to lean over his fender and across his hood and things like that and then kind of press up against a magician and rub against him like that one could say the chase gets fairly horny Oh God this is that's that's dangerous all right I hope that you have the handbrake on when it comes to making love to your car boyfriend I can't believe that sentence just came out of my mouth today Nathaniel has decided to reveal everything to his father oh no this is gonna get real cringe okay everybody strap on your cringe faces it's time to go in I'm just gonna come out and say it I guess I'm in an intimate relationship with Chase I'm sexually and emotionally you're in an intimate relationship with your car yes today and sexually with your car yes it's your car yes how does I don't how does that work how can you have sex with a car well hold on daddy dearest I'll show you at least the dad knew I mean the dad knew that he called the car chase because I was waiting for the whole age oh you're you're gay and you have a boyfriend named chase and that was like his coming-out story this is a whole different type of coming-out story okay oh like that you know what Who am I to judge Who am I to judge a man who wants to have sex with his carer and is in an intimate relationship with this care again if he's happy if he feels fulfilled go for it buddy I'm not gonna judge you you're not hurting anybody it's a little weird it's out of the norm but you know what sometimes that's all you need no one has this tricky thing called life figured out so chase I mean Nathaniel if you have it figured out go for it buddy drive your boyfriend anywhere you want does that mean when you think chase through car wash that counts as taking a shower together d do you make chase leap out sight that doesn't seem very nice oh my strange addiction I thought that was gonna be funnier than it was it just made my face too a whole lot of the rock one was still the weirdest run to me like the bleach is really weird the carrot one is really weird to me put the rock one really got to me it really made me like scratch my own nails I like grit my own teeth and everything I just I can't handle that when I started off this video all I wanted to do was I swear that whiteboard is gonna pop off the wall and slap me back he's good who's laughing now huh huh but let me know down in the comments which one you thought was the weirdest one which was the strangest addiction to you and do you have any strange addictions that people might not like are you addicted to jacksepticeye are you addicted to liking his videos that's only natural are you addicted to getting sick wins and video games and being hella epic I feel that you're addicted to making dead meme jokes yeah but whatever your addiction is go out there and be safe [Applause] [Applause] I'm gonna go have a long hair to think about my life choices

45 comments

  1. The video of Nathaniel makes me uncomfortable because the guy is making out with his car.

    It also made me laugh for the same reason

  2. All my friends r retarded but the most retarded if u tell him to eat dirt he’ll eat rocks he’ll eat paper he’ll eat human flesh he’ll eat like he’s bit me at 17 times

  3. I won't lie – I get an urge of chewing on sponges. When I look at one I think "Should I eat it?" Cus I did that when I was 6 or more. Just…sticking a piece of sponge in your mouth, chew it, then spit it later.

  4. My Strange Addiction, ie. The show that lost any credibility whatsoever after completely staging an episode trying to play into furry hatred just after it stopped being en vogue and then portraying a girl's love of Japanese fashion culture as something creepy.

    And then framing both girls involved as total lost causes when they refused to stop doing the completely harmless thing they love.

  5. My strange addiction: Collecting comics. In nine months, I have amassed approximately 1500 individual novels, and 24 published collections.

  6. I have a cringe thing imagin taking a toothpick putting it in between your toe and toe nail and then kick a wall as hard as you can

  7. As a toddler I used to eat sand and blackboard chalk and pencil lead when my pencil broke I would nibble on it. They actually tasted really nice at the time. The first woman never grew out of that phase…

    I really hope the bleach lady isn't in hospital right now -._.- This isn't cringy at all. It's worrying that there's adults doing these things (allegedly) and still seem and look healthy?

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