Medication for OCD, Pure O, and Anxiety

let's see what we got here so we have our magical box of medication today [Applause] God so I do have a lot of medication here with me today this is going to be sort of like a review of like the medication that I'm taking and how I got there and then also a review of like various supplements that I've tried out to kind of like curve my intrusive thoughts so yeah let's go ahead and get into it I'm gonna try to explain this in the absolute best way that I can I know that like this stuff I'm gonna be talking about it's a little complicated so socially want to get into the NAC I'm gonna try to like boil it down a lot of you things are gonna be talking about in this video some of them these this is just how I function and my dysfunctional life I've I know means I want you guys to take what I'm saying and be like oh this is the way I need to do things don't go by what I just do you know look into it with your psychiatrist watch other videos on it possibly read about it don't just take what I'm doing is like the Bible this is how I recover like everybody's different everybody everybody's body is different everybody's gonna take different doses did dosages of medication all right as you guys know I'm on 75 milligrams of Zoloft five milligrams at base bar every day and it take xanax when I need it so whenever I have panic attacks I'll usually take like just a freshen of a pill just to calm me down and if it's really bad and I'll take even more of a fraction I very rarely ever go past 0.25 milligrams of xanax which is really not a lot in comparison to those big 2 milligram bars that you usually see xanax coming first in our medication box we have the medication that I'm currently on which is searcher line I have them in these little 100 milligram tablets this is like a makeup video just let me swatch this medication for you that doesn't work that's what it looks like so when it comes to an SSRI like when you're getting situated on your SSRI there's like this sweet spot with an SSRI that you'll find that if when you're working with a psychiatrist you're looking for that sweet spot and basically that sweet spot is if it's too little it's not gonna work enough and if you're taking too much like more than you should then you're actually gonna end up getting more anxious or depressed I mean they'll probably up you just like a very small dosage until you get to that point where you're like oh this feels good like this is working for me and then you'll notice that if you go just a little bit over that dosage you'll be like uh no there though there will be a drastic difference like you will be able to tell like this is my stable dosage and my stable dosage happened to be 75 milligrams which meant that the way my psychiatrist at ordered the medication previously was in these big 100 tablet whatever's so I'll split the pill in half and then I'll split it that pill in half and I'll just take three of those little 25 milligram increments and I do that every day that's for the time of day that I take it I don't know I just don't stick to like taking it a certain time of day every day would it have been more effective that way probably but my schedule is so erratic and I really don't have much of a schedule my schedules just all over the place right now so I really don't take it at a certain time of day but I do usually take my medication right before I go to sleep so that's like my reminder like right before I lay down I know like Rachel you need to take your medication you know looking at the ceiling or something to 3:00 in the morning I'll think oh sure I forgot to take my meds that's the Zoloft I might have message it but I might have mentioned this in a previous video but I didn't just find Zoloft like right off the bat as like this is the medication that works for me like it did take me a couple to figure out like this is what works for me chances are if you do you know walk into a psychiatrist's or a you know psychologists office can be like I have to the EIP ROI of intrusive thoughts they're probably going to put you on an SSRI right off the bat and they'll probably start you out with the lowest dosage possible with Zoloft you can go up to 200 milligrams and believe it or not with people with OCD and Piro you actually end up taking a higher dosage of SSRIs like you end up taking almost the highest dosage which is why I thought it was really peculiar that like I stopped at 75 milligrams I honestly expected to go over a hundred but like I said before when I was going over 100 I was depressed I was just I felt so groggy and and weighed down and I couldn't they find it hard to get out of bed I find it harder to go to work it was just it did not work for me so this is my sweet spot the two medications that they had me on before I got on the zoloft was I know I have them in here like I have everything in here uh we got the very first one was celexa and then it was luvox the celexa was great it really really noticed a difference at first but my problem with the celexa was I was having these like spontaneous panic attacks and like having OCD and puro I don't normally have panic attacks like not like panic disorder not those types of panic attacks might my anxiety attacks are a lot different than when you have panic attacks like the only times I've ever really had a legit panic attack it's one of abuse medication or I drank on medication so when I started having these little spurts of like just getting panicky like out of nowhere it was like something I've never experienced before and I was like I know that's not me that's probably the medication so I got off the meds I'd been taking it for a probably a little less than a year and I got on to luvox we're gonna continuously do this we did swatching thank you so pointless dude I'm fucking crazy the luvox was just terrible like I knew within like two or three months luvox and I weren't gonna work out we just weren't getting along it just it wasn't the right relationship for me so no Lube ah it was a no-go and it was around that time to my psychiatrist looked at me and was like so you got any ideas and I was like I don't know my grandmother songs Ola it works pretty well for her and he was like all right well let's give it a go and that's how I got on so lost ended up working out for me and surprisingly being on a lot of like medication forums and stuff I've noticed that like people with OCD like a lot of them takes a loss obviously there is no like study that probably correlates that so ups better for people with OCD and everybody's different but I just like noticed that a lot of people that with OCD like are on Zoloft so when I started on my medication because the way I got on to medication god bless the way I got on to medication was kind of crazy it was right when I was out of the hospital I went to the hospital for suicidal thoughts and I was just really at my lowest point and I might or might not have pretty sure I talked about that in my Piro OCD story video and I talked about like they put me on a benzo while I was in the hospital actually no it wasn't a benzo damn they put me on an antihistamine out of the hospital on anxiety medication but it wasn't in his being like benadryl made me tired all the time but I wasn't stressed out anymore I wasn't like freaking out you know having anxiety I was tired all the time but it like patched up that part of me if that makes sense it it got rid of the anxiety but made me really fucking tired um so obviously you can't function on antihistamines all the time so they took me off and histamines got me with a psychiatrist and they had me on the SSRI but to kind of curve being xiety while I was getting situated on an SSRI because as you guys know or may not know it takes about four to six to eight weeks to get situated on an SSRI for it to actually start working it's a very gradual process and that's also why when you're on an SSRI you should we Muir self off gradually which I didn't do which another video so they put me on the safest anxiety education that they could which was boost bar and boost bar isn't a benzo to my knowledge is actually one of the oldest types of anxiety medication but it's it's not as powerful as a pen so you know it's not like you take a boost bar you're like it's not like that at all it's definitely not like that it just it just curves some of the like physiological symptoms of the anxiety like the RACI heart and the sweating and the dizziness so I was taking a very low dosage of that for a while five milligrams and I upped it to like 10 or 15 but that really didn't work out for me honestly when it after like five when I got to 10 and 15 it just made me dizzy and I was like this isn't even helping at this point so I just I keep it at 5 and I really don't even know why I still take it to this day I think it's just out of comfort and because I've been on it for so long I just take five milligrams every day with my SSRI like normal because I guess not a habit but just because I'm so used to it and it's definitely not harmful so you know it just it gives me that extra cushion I guess it's like comfort and support for me let's talk about something else let's talk about benzos it's not really necessary for you if you have I believe if you have OCD or pro2 take a benzo unless it's temporary because benzos are like a band-aid they make you feel better temporarily but they don't fix the problem now if you get on an SSRI or glutamate modulator talk about that later those medications will patch up your OCD or your Piro very well it will make you pretty much go back to normal whatever normal is goddamn music so benzos just temporary relieve the anxiety but if you get in an SSRI or a glutamate modulator then it will actually take away the obsessive thinking and the intrusive thoughts and the compulsions and all of that it affects the actual disorder I'd say for for people who have really chronic and anxiety like not that I'm saying city isn't just as bad but panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder panic disorder agoraphobia you'll more often see those types of diagnosis receiving like benzos because they constantly are in a state of panic or anxiety while OCD isn't always in a state of panic or anxiety it's only when our obsessions are activated well actually I take that back we're just in a different kind of anxiety it's really difficult to explain but I just don't recommend if you're if you have OCD or Piro that you take benzos every day they are addictive they are a temporary band-aid and quite frankly if you cut yourself cold-turkey on them they can potentially be fatal so I just don't I don't I don't really condone it for treating OCD or puro the reason why I was on a benzo was because I I ween I didn't wean myself off of my SSRIs I just stopped taking my zoloft my like brain was like well you know what you're doing a lot better you're in a better place so let's just completely cut your medication cold turkey that sounds like a good idea just stop taking it so I did and for a while I was great I was like I cured my OCD for like two months I was like I'm cured like that was it that's all the hell is over all of a sudden my obsessions just like it's so bad like I had this terrible terrible terrible scrupulous itty obsession about being possessed by the devil and it felt like I was being possessed because the anxiety was coming back with such full force from cutting myself cold turkey off of the SSRI I was getting I was getting symptoms of SSRI withdrawal but my uneducated and an experienced self was like this is an SSRI withdrawal this must be the devil possessing me but I'm go to the hospital freaking out you know I was having a 7 hour long panic attack I was having the most anxiety that I've ever had in my entire life I was really scared I thought I was I thought I needed to be locked up in a sigh theatrical spittle I actually didn't stay overnight they just gave me a divan and they send me home because it was a Saturday the hospital was full and they couldn't take me in there was a lot of problems with family and there was a lot of financial problems with family and I didn't think I could afford staying in the hospital so they just gave me the benzo and I was bedridden for about a week I couldn't leave the house the panic attacks were about like seven or eight a day and then they slowly kind of dwindled down as I got situated on the SSRI the panic attacks also went away little by little until I was only having about one a day and then after like a month or two it kind like I didn't have anymore panic attacks which is what I was used to I wouldn't used to having panic attacks at all after I got off the ativan because I ran out obviously the hospital gives you so much then I went to my psychiatrist and I was like I really need something to take the edge off because I'm a dumbass and I've used my medication and now I'm having panic attacks every day I don't even know how to handle it because that's not even something that I'm used to so that's when he prescribed me the xanax honestly guys I probably have only used this sanics like I would say like enough times that I can count on my hands and my toes like I really haven't used a lot of the cynics at all each of these milligram tablets is 0.25 is one full pink tablet is 0.25 milligrams of xanax so I don't even take that full tablet I split that babe in half and I take half which is 0.125 mass which is if you guys have ever attacked taking xanax before which is like basically nothing and then he took my psyche our justice advised like take more of that if you need it but please stray away from it because it's addictive and I was super scared of getting addicted to xanax because there's a big substance abuse problem in my family and so I really honestly was pretty responsible with my xanax I didn't really ever take it unless I was having a panic attack so for OCD and Piro I recommend that if they put you on benzos use it discreetly only take it if you're having a panic attack okay but if you have panic disorder agoraphobia generalized anxiety just really severe anxiety then obviously it's gonna be a different story for you you might just well have to take the medication every day my aunt has to take her benzos every day it just it's just how it it's just how it happens sometimes sometimes you need it you actually need to stay on that medication because it's too hard for you to be off of it and there's you know I've I really try to accept that with myself because I always thought like oh if I'm on medication for the rest of my life it means I'm a freak but you know going into psychology field and really getting into all that I've noticed that there's really nothing different about you having a mental chemical imbalance Minh in your brain is the same as having you know a broken leg the same as having diabetes it's a disease and it really shouldn't be treated you know with any sort of shame because you know because you have to take medication every day there's nothing wrong with that I just really advise everybody that I'm talking to about it to be safe because I made a lot of mistakes in my past because I it wasn't as open with the professional was about what I was doing I didn't necessarily trust them and I didn't trust my family and I didn't trust myself and I was just really really irresponsible with some of the things that I did so please avoid that because it took me so freakin long to get back on the SSRI and I'm I'm good now I'm stable now but for like three months after I had cut myself cold-turkey I was still having these weird panic attacks here and there and my OCD was really out of whack and I was also moving at the same time I was maybe into a different city while this is all going on and oh my god I just don't recommend it just please be safe please communicate with the professionals about what you're doing because you know as much as I like to believe I knew better I didn't yeah be safe mmm I was really serious all right so again I'm making a really fucking long video so I might have to cut this shit into two parts this always happens I always just go on a rant and I just thank you guys so much I love you guys have a great rest of your day and


  1. Medications for ocd are a placebo there is no known cause so they have no exact method , they slow down your thought process , but it doesn’t alter how you think . If anything it would slightly increase your motivation and or ultimately decrease it dependent on your body and chemical balance . Medications made me gain mass amounts and threw my hormones into a hole . Ocd is becoming self aware and finding inner peace through whatever mentality it puts you into . It’s a process . I’ve had it since infancy .

  2. I suffered from pure OCD for years all the worst denominations, harm both physical and sexual, possession, suicide every terrible kind you could think of always morphing and reassessing with my own fear. I unexpectedly cured this with my first time use of an entheogen (LSD), it was so miraculous that I was recently compelled to make a video with the hope that those being tortured as I was may find relief in a similar manner. Prescribed medication for OCDs, antidepressants and SSRIs are an abomination. It would be necessary to come off those first before attempting any entheogen based cure (LSD/Psilocybin) as they interfere with the way psychedelics react with the brain and serotonin receptors and in some cases suppress all effects entirely. @ – I wish peace, love and healing to all however it may be achieved.

  3. Great vids O Girl and it eased my mind some trying to google symptoms and self diagnose until I stumbled upon your vids. I’m happy knowing I’m not alone because for years I can’t relate or I’m just the crazy guy. Love all your vids.

  4. I took Zoloft and it made me fall asleep in the middle of the day have you had any side effects from it?

  5. I find these meds either don't work, side effects outweigh benefits, or work but stop working. Once a med that works well stops working it's a nightmare.

  6. Its funny, in Australia Xanax is banned. Doctors no longer prescribe it because its so addictive. So i now take valium instead for my panic attacks. I also take Effexor and neulactil. But i have put on weight because of it! 😣😣😭

  7. I don't know on what I am I take uvox 200 mg, clofranil 25 mg, sizodon 25 mg . These is medication prescribed in India. But still the anxiety levels sucks with panic stages not attacks.

  8. Do SSRI's help with focus? Because my Pure O makes it incredibly hard to focus on daily activities that it's made me want to give up on life. But I'm seeing my psychiatrist soon, in 21 days.. But I'm currently on 20mg of Prozac and it hasn't done anything to clear my mind. Just wondering if your medication has helped clear your mind and helped you focus? Sorry if you've answered this in your video, I'm writing this while still watching.

  9. Really? Luvox works pretty well for me (in a high dose). I take 250mg per day + a small "therapy" which is how to react when an intrusive thought strikes. It's been salvation so far

  10. <this person with ocd is on zoloft too, and busbar when needed. I like it better than klonopin even though it takes a bit longer to activate, it doesn't make me groggy or sick. And i haven't taken it for four or five months?

  11. Hi do you have the intrusive thoughts all the time or there is times when is worse ? I am trying to figure out if nine is pure ocd or anxiety/panic attacks

  12. Your an (empath) read about it! Its very interesting and I have OCD too. However, I dont take pills I meditate twice a day and Im on a low carb high fat diet to control my blood sugar levels. The pills have major side affects!

  13. Thank you for this video, this way I don't feel alone. You are fantastic. I start the day well and feel good in spite of crazy thoughts I know Im not alone, thank you <3

  14. ROCD ruins every relationship I'm in such as a friendship or relationship with a significant other… Maybe at some time in the future I will be medicated optimally, so I can actually form friendships and even have a relationship with someone who I want something deeper with. I think your video has given many of us hope for a better future, great job!

  15. I was having intrusive thoughts an i recently took sertraline but now im having the thoughts but not so much intrusive can anyone else relate

  16. I haven't been diagnosed with it, but I feel like it would be near impossible to control Pure O OCD without medication. Good thing we were born in the age where we have luxuries like that. I do know the Benadryl feeling, it's very calming and serene. It's even stopped a panic attack before (for a few hours until I woke back up…)

  17. Has anyone been on Effexor for pure o? I’ve been on it for 6 years and recently had to up by dose but the anxiety is still bad. I’ve always doubted if it’s the best antidepressant for this type of condition.

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