Two and a Half Men – Alan’s Therapy: Charlie as Judith [HD]

I know you only deal with kids, but I didn’t know where else to take him. This is ridiculous. I don’t need to be here. I gave you a choice. Take the long shower or talk to the doctor. Well, if I had to guess, and that’s pretty much all I do here… I would have to say that, based on his inappropriate outbursts and sleepwalking Alan is struggling with a great deal of suppressed rage. Rage? I don’t think so. Oh, come on. Your wife threw you out of your own house… she still runs your life, you’re broke… and you only get to see your kid two days a week, one of which you have to bring him to this rug rat exorcist. No offense. Okay. Now, Alan, how do you feel about what Charlie just shared? Well, I think he’s completely off base. I mean, yes, I get a little frustrated sometimes and you know, when Judith doesn’t get her own way, she just keeps… coming at me… and coming at me like a freaking steamroller. Crushing my spirit and my self-respect. That’s very good. But on the other hand, she’s a very good Mom to Jake. Okay, I’ll tell you what. Let’s pretend… that Judith is sitting in this chair. What would you tell her right now? Boy, I don’t know. I feel a little silly talking to an empty chair. Fair enough. Charlie, do you mind? Do I mind what? Thank you. Now, Alan. Tell Judith how you really feel. Well ehm… Judith… I know you’re working through some of your own issues. Sexual and otherwise… and I support that. That’s telling her, Alan! Charlie, remember you’re Judith. Sorry. That’s telling me, Alan. Is this gonna take much longer? Because I have to get through a massage then a tennis lesson that he’s paying for. Tennis? Since when do you play tennis? I told you, but you never listen! He never listens, thank God his brother took him in. Okay, I am warning you. You’re warning me? Okay, Alan, how are you feeling right now? Well… A little angry. Really? Because you don’t sound angry. Well, I am. I just don’t see any reason to make a big spectacle of myself. Yeah, you’d rather blow off a sure thing who actually makes a living with her ass. Meaningless, loveless sex is not the answer, Charlie. Meow, fitchoo! I am really getting tired of that. Yeah, you know what, Charlie, I don’t much care for that either. If you like, we can schedule another session to deal with your fear of vaginas. Now, Alan. The reason I asked you if you were angry is because I have yet to see any genuine expression of what are undoubtedly some very powerful feelings. Well, I’m sorry, but that’s just the best I can do. Okay, well let’s try something else. This… is called a bataca. It’s heavily padded can’t hurt anyone but you can use it to vent your deep, angry feelings. You’re wasting your time, Doc. He’s too much of a wimp- Attaboy, Alan! Let it go! Go on! Good! I’m so mad! I hate you! Who do you hate, Alan? Who do you hate? Everybody! Go on, let it go! Keep going, Alan! Wait a minute! Stop! Should I stop? Well, it’s up to you. You paid for the full hour, so…

100 comments

  1. Charlie "Wait, stop
    Alan "Shall I stop?"
    Jane "Well it's up to you, you paid for the full hour, so"
    That's quite funny haha

  2. I feel bad for Alan but seriously he needs to get his head out of his ass. "Meaningless casual sex is not the answer", "Judith is a good mom to Jake". What a whipped idiot. He doesn't know how to take a joke. No wonder nobody likes him.

  3. I AM SO MAD! I AM SO MAD! I AM SO MAD!!!!! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!! I HATE YOU!!!
    WHO DO YOU HATE, ALAN?! WHO DO YOU HATE?!?!
    EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Every man going through an unjust divorce – >95% at least – should be entitled to have this venting opportunity whenever they need it

  5. I think Charlie did more than just being funny in the series. His expressions, his line delivery and his involvement in the role and his incomparable acting skills.

  6. Charlie as Judith hilarious. This scene is hilarious and the therapist telling Charlie about schedule another session to deal with his fear of vaginas lol.

  7. I think all divorced couples should do this. My parents are going through it right now and it’s driving me nuts

  8. Surprised how people don’t see the fact that the shrink set the whole thing up to get back at charlie using Allan with the blue toy.

  9. Who watch this show without Charlie? Allan is a shameless annoying mooch. And Jake is worse and worse the older he gets. I couldn't even get through the first ep of season 9.

  10. Charlie was really hilarious impersonating Judith. The only thing missing was mentioning how Judith intimidates Alan with her lawyer

  11. Alan has the worse kind of anger, the anger that's bottled up so tight that if it ever got to the point where it TRULY busted open, he's going to get a gun and either off himself or turn Charlie's house into Columbine 2.0

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